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Not A Love Song

from Blood Meridian by Trademarc

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lyrics

Verse One
It's real, it's been twenty plus years
I learn to love living forgive the plenty of tears
In between what I would hear Word of mouth about who you were with why where no
matter how much I cared
I couldn't grasp the fact you wasn't here
Every time i though about you it's like saying goodbye it's so weird, the way it played out
pictures in my mind of you would never fade out, slowly phased out ya life
Caught the last glimpse of you in mirror, i hit the headlights
And drove off, your voice so soft you said
'It was nice to know you' i said "i'm sorry"
You said 'apologies were something that you never owed me' i said "we'll talk soon" you
said don't wait around for you to call me
Coldly shook my hand i said i loved you for the last time you walked away calmly
It felt like a flatline the conversation ended promptly,

I'm sorry i was that blind
Verse Two
I sit alone amidst the light for regrets
the things we set in stone, i'd just like to forget, being locked up leaving messages you
would never get
Calling collect, charges you would never accept
I came around and found god never credible
He said the writing's on the wall it's just never legible
your friends told you I was crazy
man let him go
And like a movie you just sat and watch the credits roll
Stories change, we exit the stage, you was on the next chapter i was stuck on the same
page
A picture may be worth a thousand words
But it's tough when the line between the past and the present blurs
I lost focus on these dead man curves
I'm sorry i was lost but i guess i got what i deserved, i lost everything i had in my life
And i'm not saying that this song could ever make it alright
Verse Three
I guess I'm moving on
I guess I'm doing aiiiiight
They say forget about her
I try to heed their advice it's like swimming upstream bad dreams every night i bet every
now and then ya still know what i mean
S'Like part of my life is always off never gon be right sorta like the afterthought of you
becoming my wife and hindsight is just another way to see what you lost Of course it
never leads to insight (but it might)
All caught up in what should have been nice
Despite what that hole in my life had just put us in
But more than ever I learned to sever ties with whatever brought pain in my life or ever
could again
This ain't a love song it's me moving on
the only way that I can
the only way that I know
the only way i can stand
the only way i can show
you help me grow as a man
you should know

credits

from Blood Meridian, released November 22, 2019

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Trademarc Boston, Massachusetts

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